Take me back to the theater!

\

Okay, I look stupid, but i don’t care. I miss Harlequin.

Day 147 of 366

Finally went out after 4 days of diarrhea. Stayed within my area though, because I felt sick again as I stepped out of the house and were about to head to SM North.  Ended up talking and laughing about crappy telenovelas and hilarious plots while eating dinner at Le Ching and sipping on mango and lychee shakes at Ersao. Fine, fine day. 

I also received the verification that I’m graduating (finally). It’s official. 

Where do I go from here?

I’m now quite okay (physically). You see, the suffering is not really my biggest concern here but how overwhelmed I am with this life and feel like I’m wasting every second of my precious time. I should be happy. Happy because things are finally over. Happy because, finally, I don’t have to do those “school obligations”. Happy because I am about to end and begin “a new chapter in my life”.

All the more that I’m pressured to grow up, to find a job, to do things I’ve never done before: Pay income taxes, maybe handle the family business, take my dad to the doctor myself, give him his monthly shot of Haloperidol with my shaky hands, save up for a car and a house and not for a Hello Kitty stuffed toy. I’m just too pressured that I don’t even have time to relish the last moments of my college days: the moment I uttered my final word of my final reporting, the moment I heard the applause of my classmates, the moment I typed my very last “paper”, the moment I made my final exit to school when I was an undergraduate - basically my ‘lasts’. The mere thought that these things will never be the same again and that my mind wasn’t ‘there’ to witness and feel all of it, it just sucks.

I wanted to cry ever since and every time these things happen, but I guess I just, almost literally, don’t have tears left anymore. I guess my body gave up on me huh? It’s quite pathetic that I have to fake-cry just for the sake of release and to tell my body, “Enough”. Quite tantamount to me commanding my brain to stop working because it’s tired.

Oh Lord, I’m sorry, but sometimes, I wish Peter Pan was real.

Sucks when you’re sick.

As if the whole world has the inability to function without you (hello, home).

It’s been more than three days. Is there any other way to expedite my recovery from diarrhea? Sucks. Sucks. Sucks. Sucks.

Anonymous asked: Please get your rest... I hope you'll get well soon :( I love you :* big day tomorrow, wish me luck dear...

I will, Haj. Thank you. :-) Good luck on your first day. study well okay? And then when I’m well enough let’s have Bubble Tea. :*

How to Love Your Authentic Self

Day 142 of 366

God. I owe a lot of blog posts.

Things have been so sudden lately.

So for the meantime I’ll post these photos from yesterday.

It was my very first time to play bowling, but I didn’t expect to be the suckiest player ever in history. My 6 pound ball (take note: 6-pound) kept going to the gutter for five successive rounds. How lame! Haha. I was able to redeem myself though during the second game, when I finally used my left hand (stupid me, I forgot I’m left-handed -.-) and found out I’m better off with a 10-pound ball.

 

L-R: Fujiko, Takahiro, Ralph Ramos, Rey Olanday, Miho Buenaventura

Went bowling and played billiards with Ralph, Rey, Miho, Taka and his ‘cousin’ (Sorry, I keep forgetting names!). Headed to pizza hut for a break then went back for another game. I am happy to have tried doing things for the first time (bowling), and I think I’m starting to like sports, finally. Haha.

The first fours days will be hectic: Enchanted kingdom on Monday (today, which was so sudden), Batangas on Tuesday and Wednesday morning, and date with Haj later in the evening. Summer, please let my last days be awesome.